It's a Dog Eat Surf & Turf World

If there is anyone on this planet who loves food more than I do, it is my dog. This is a tragedy as he pretty much eats shit and woodchip flavored dog food. Twice a day. Sometimes he gets a baby carrot as a midday snack. When he has an upset stomach he gets chicken and rice (which baffles me as to why he just doesn’t try and have an upset stomach or at least pretend to moan about a stomach ailment just so he doesn’t have to eat shit pebbles). Oh, and he only drinks water. We can usually trick him into thinking he’s getting a food treat by tossing him an ice cube. At first he gets so excited and chomps down on it like he just discovered the best food ever, but then quickly gets bored when he realizes it’s just turning into water. Every time.

Once,  I tasted his food because I thought for sure (by the way he got so damn excited when it was dinner time and inhaled it in mere seconds) it had to be the most delectable food on the planet. Wrong. As my chomping slowed down, my saliva seemed to vanish, and I began to dry heave, I looked down at the pained and tearful eyes staring back up at me. I had taken a bite of his precious, most treasured possession; his sheer motivation to exist each day.  I figured I’d better act like I thought it was as scrumptious as he did. So I slowly got it down as I “mmmmm’ed” and “ohhhhhh’ed” in its “deliciousness”.

I imagine this is how he relates food:

 

If I was having surf and turf for dinner everynight, Id get pretty excited too.





Midday sushi snack? Don’t mind if I do!



This is some good comfort food but I ordered the surf and turf…

 Now, when I’m eating in front of him I try not to get too excited or vocal about its delightfulness. I don’t want him to know that his food sucks and my food doesn’t. I feel guilty enough that the poor guy will never get to have sex. Although he tries. A lot. But that’s for another blog…



Live to Eat and Not the Other Way Around.

I am a huge proponent of food. Let me rephrase that: I. Live. To. Eat. I come from a family that loves food so much that we plan to eat somewhere months in advance, talk about it everyday leading up to it, drive hours to get there, and with food in mouth, immediately start discussing where our next meal will be, or a past meal that we loved. Hardly ever do we discuss the actual food that we've waited for so long, with such anticipation to eat.

My life moments are defined by food:

My Bat Mitzvah was a blur of "Electric Slides" with one clear memory of the deliciously yummy chocolate chip pound cake from Warrington Bakery. Trips to Hawaii are sunsets over-shadowed by Mahi Mahi with macadamia nut beurre blanc from the Beach House Restaurant.  Disney World is fun, but the Fettuccine at Alfredo's in Epcot's Italy is where it's at. Babe's and my first date was a magical spark of cheese tortellini with a pink sauce at Caesars in Bristol. Our Wedding was one of the best lamb chop moments of my life and our Honeymoon was a hot and steamy escargot perfectly seasoned with a to-die-for cream sauce. 

So, my foodie friends, live life with an appetite and savor each and every delicious moment.